I have to start by saying, this gave me genuine joy to finally find a topic I’ve been eager to jump on, but waiting for the right time. We’ve literally come to the point where people are trying to bring whatever animal they can think of on an airplane with them. Oddly enough, if you really think about it logistically it’s not as absurd as a number of things I can imagine people trying to smuggle on an airplane in plain sight (and probably/maybe have?)…Tazmanian devil, skunk, pack of “support” wolves…?  Who cares if they’re cute, right?

I’ll be blunt on my take of this, if you weren’t in the armed forces, are a legitimate schizophrenic, or have severe depression, you don’t need to fly with your animal, or ANY animal for that matter. No one did it…ever…for decades, and life went on. The level of ENTITLEMENT going on in today’s society makes me want to barf, and praise Jesus people keep pushing the envelope just to see how God damned asinine our society has become, because hey, honestly…maybe they would let you on the airplane with your peacock!?

 

DISCLAIMER: SOME people really do need these “support” animals, but they should very clearly need to be trained animal. Labradors are smart and intelligent animals, fully capable of being trained to guide a blind person through their entire life, without the sense of sight. Peacocks are dumb, beautiful birds.  Here’s some examples of ridiculous airplane behavior…

The line’s been getting blurred for some time now, and as someone who flies at least a few times a month, I can’t recall my last trip to the airport that some kind of service animal wasn’t at least around me in the terminal as I waited for my flight. I’ve seen anything from a hairless cat to a turtle on my flight, and it’s getting fucking ridiculous. Now, we’re almost letting Peacocks fly…and when I hear it that way, it sounds downright cruel to deny them…every bird deserves a chance to soar. But seriously, imagine this asshole clogging up the center aisle, just because she needs a stretch.

A good friend, and travel companion of mine is also a lawyer, and admittedly acquired an easy-to-come-by physician’s note to allow her Great Dane puppy (whom is already over 100 lbs.) to become a “service dog,” in order to accompany her on a flight from Washington D.C. to San Francisco. Like a considerate human, she at least bought out the whole row of seats to enable herself, and the dog, to have some room on the fight, without disturbing the other passengers. But that doesn’t mean the ten rows, front and back, don’t have to smell large dog all flight, praying it doesn’t take a 10 lb. shit in the center aisle. Her flight had a connection, and although the pup made it through the first leg, it did (and this is a fact) take a huge runny shit directly in the walkway of the connecting terminal. My point, a line needs to be drawn. People are flat out taking advantage of a downright awful system of travel that hasn’t been properly updated since the 70’s.

I’ll let you draw your own conclusions on the issue, and my first official shout out to another blogger goes to Matthew from, Live And Let’s Fly, for raising “awareness,” on the topic of how absurd we’ve become as a society (my own words, not his).  Link to their original post, here.  Everyone’s special, everyone’s important, who cares what anyone else thinks or feels? I’m honestly not shocked. When people are so self obsessed with their own online image/persona why would that take a back seat for basic human decency and social etiquette? I wonder if I shove a gerbil up my ass if they’ll let me through security if I show them my signed doctor’s note that it relieves my anxiety?

In summation, some people have real problems, problems that might warrant bringing an animal with you on an airplane. Most people, however, do not. If you’re unfortunate enough to genuinely fall into that category, then for Christ sake, have a trained animal, or flat out just don’t travel that way, or leave your animal behind at a boarding house, or pay to book it on an animal only flight…or any number of 1,000 other options I can think of that puts you, unfortunately, where you belong, in the minority, capable of handling your unique situation while the rest of society functions smoothly. Harsh? Maybe. True? Probably.

 

Or…just roll the dice and bring your fucking peacock to the airport and see what happens. Your call, Ace!